Devil’s Bridge in the Schoellenen

Painting Title: Devil’s Bridge in the Schoellenen
Artist: Caspar Wolf (1735-1783)
Location: Private Collection

Swiss painter Caspar Wolf was known primarily for his landscape paintings, those with the Alps to be precise. Wolf’s imagery of glaciers, waterfalls, caves or creeks are epic, and so much so that with the aid of the grey tone of colorization in his paintings, those natural formations seem cold and impervious- a lurking hostility that welcomes not the viewers’ ready absorption. One can imagine standing before a grand painting by Wolf and not awed by its overwhelming magnificence but woefully dwarfed by its monstrosity.

Seen here the 1777 painting titled, Devil’s Bridge in the Schoellenen. A precipitous bridge straddles between the gorges, which magnitude dominates the majority of the canvas, and reduces the sky to merely a conical view. A rumbling stream of water races to its still pool, and the boisterous spirit within, reluctant to be transmuted abruptly to insipid sedateness, bubbles still white and frothy.

The travelers, possibly trudging up to the summit, and down through all the creaks and crevices untrammeled, suddenly encounter this bridge, which, thanks to the white vapor of the waterfall, is made only dimly visible. One can almost feel the palpitation of the travelers’, when the deafening din of the rushing water only contributes to their growingly fainter hearts. Finally, an audacious one takes a tentative step on the wobbly-looking bridge, and nimbly he crosses to the safe side all in one breathe. Triumphantly the victor raises his horse and beckons his companions to come trotting through.

For me the painting is an embodiment of courage, a whipping-up of the collective morale, and a shaft of hopeful light through the heavily encompassing mist of desolation and danger. It is also a pictorial evidence of the underestimated power of men, which is often preternaturally augmented when facing their toughest moment.

WTF IS UP WITH THESE PENIS ENHANCEMENTS?! (I’m sorry for this random post)

As if the phrase ‘penis enhancement’ isn’t funny enough – the marketing department of most penis enlargement products make the most hilarious ads ever. Almost all of these commercials hire female models to endorse and that’s when you start to get really confused. Umm… what makes the penis bigger? The product or the random chick?!

You can hardly see an ad where they actually use a real product user. This doesn’t come as a surprise at all. Who in the right mind would claim to have used the product to grow his own dick? It’s embarrassing, not to mention the notoriety you will gain after appearing in a wiener ad.

I have no idea if there are actually products that genuinely offer help so you won’t have to deal with a mini Johnson for the rest of your life. I saw some really scary stuff on the internet because these stupid fucking ads are everywhere. I swear, these penis enhancements come in all forms – pumps, pills, creams, and some horrifying gadgets. WTF?! I’m like, “DUUUUUUUUDE?! WHY THE HELL WOULD YOU PUT THAT ON YOUR DICK OMGOMGOMGOMG….”

Bananas and Hilarious Euphemisms

There’s this dumb myth going around that eating bananas, apparently, will make your penis bigger. Well this is disappointing to the aspiring but NO – bananas and penises are a myth made by a bunch of crackheads, so get over it.

If you are on the web too much, you will eventually stumble upon some pretty crazy stuff. Have you heard of these hilarious penis enlargements euphemisms?

  • Adding a wing to the sexual addiction clinic
  • Doubling the interest rate on your mutual fun
  • Genetational pinocchiotomy
  • Getting a Magic Johnson
  • Peter padding
  • Plumbing the ball park frank
  • Preparing to boldly go where no manhood has gone before
  • Puffin’ the magic dragon
  • Putting the archbishop on the rack
  • Putting the munchkin on stilts
  • Supersizing Big Mac
  • Taking the train from Vienna to Frankfurt
  • Trading in the escort for a stretch limo
  • Turning crouching tiger into hidden dragon
  • Upgrading passenger Johnson to first class

I think I somehow understand the desire of some men to have a giganormous shrong, but I’m pretty sure you can still pleasure a woman even if you are below average size. Although, a survey says that only 3 out of 10 women don’t mind having partners who are… well, modestly hung. But 7 women (that’s more than half!) prefer well endowed men! This is why the urge to trade the escort for a stretch limo is becoming a viable idea. I don’t know though. Personally, I wouldn’t know how to react if I found out that my partner has a monthly bill for tool maintenance.

I’m sorry. I don’t mean to be judgmental, or make fun of men who “enhance”. It’s just that…. these ads get into my nerves!!

go-away-penis-enlargement-ad

Narcissus & Goldmund – The Duality of the Soul in Hermann Hesse

Right after tweeting something profane with a hint of complaining about the need to post a new blog entry, I got a reply from this dude saying, “Perhaps, ‘The Duality of the Soul in Hermann Hesse’ …”

I would never have thought of that myself. I’ve been reading quite a lot lately; but none ever piqued my interest the way James Luchte’s (guy on Twitter) genius idea did. For a guy to pitch in quite a subject, it’s only natural to think that he knows a whole fucking lot – he can probably shut me up and tell me 100 things I know nothing of – as seen on his blog (follow him; he’s like the needle through your veins).

And so, having read Narcissus & Goldmund by the great Hermann Hesse myself, it was easy for me to seek inspiration. For Hesse enthusiasts, you already know that he’s keen on the turmoil and duality of the human soul. That is, according to my research. For the unfortunate souls who haven’t had the life-changing encounter yet, well… this might help – I pray.

herman hesse

In Narcissus & Goldmund, Hesse takes two young men – one devoted to the hermetic religious life and another more into the decadent artistic life – and follows them through adulthood. It is obvious that Hesse wants to examine the spiritual/cerebral approach to existence versus the more artistic/physical approach to life, and to find them both wanting.

Narcissus and Goldmund simultaneously seek for life’s meaning through the sacred and the profane. They offer a binary of opposing beliefs, depicted with few successes and mortal failures. Goldmund, the wayward wayfarer, understands the demand for atonement on his life. But this burden can only temporarily bind — not transform — his spirit of rebellion. Narcissus, accepts the joyless labor of his calling because he needs the security and order within the Church.

The pervasive theme in Narcissus and Goldmund depicts the human longing to find lasting contentment. Goldmund lost his soul in the search for purpose and fulfillment while Narcissus’ secure but joyless life of drudgery (masquerading as devotion) was demolished. Although Narcissus acknowledges “a man may abide by the Commandments and be far from God,” he never grasps this truth in his experiential knowledge of God. He serves without love or thought. He, like Goldmund is a slave, abject in existence.

This novel is a philosophical and allegorical story of the friendship between two exact opposites, one staying in the medieval monastery to pursue his career of deprivation, intellectualism, scholarship and logic; the other becoming a vagabond who wanders from landscape to landscape, trouble to trouble, love affair to love affair. The two are almost personifications of opposites, but this only strengthens their friendship built on differences and ensures that despite years of separation, they continually think of each other and enrich each other’s life through a different worldview.

This conflict between flesh and spirit, between an emotional and a contemplative man, was a life study for Hesse. It is a theme that transcends all time. I haven’t read all of Hesse’s major works yet, but next on my list is Steppenwolf, the theme of which describes the conflict between bourgeois acceptance and spiritual self-realization in a middle-aged man, and then The Glass Bead Game – the dualism of the contemplative and the active life.

P.S.

Sorry if some points are scattered – I write like a maniac. I recommend you read the book for you to understand better, and maybe you’ll find this post somewhat enlightening.

Again, my eternal gratitude to Mr. James Luchte. Your brain is bad-ass, sir.